


Three Facts About Tony Stark and Politics (and One About Women)

by quigonejinn



Category: Iron Man (Movies)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-09
Updated: 2012-04-09
Packaged: 2017-11-03 07:41:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/378969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quigonejinn/pseuds/quigonejinn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fact 0: Tony Stark did not vote for Obama.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Three Facts About Tony Stark and Politics (and One About Women)

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by [Tony Stark Facts Tumblr](http://tonystarkfacts.tumblr.com/) via jamaillith.

Fact 1. Before going to Afghanistan, Tony Stark was planning to vote for McCain.

Fact 2. After coming back from Afghanistan, Tony Stark was planning to vote for McCain personally, like, going and pulling the lever himself rather than just having Pepper fill out the absentee ballot. In fact, he was a fan. A really big fan. Even when he was in hiding and not talking to the media, he had Pepper reach out to McCain campaign and let them know that he supported them, that his father would have been a big supporter of a war hero like John McCain. Was there anything he could do for them? McCain's campaign wasn't sure how they felt about the endorsement, so Tony asked Pepper of a million dollars or whatever, and Pepper said that he already had donated the maximum. Stark Industries has been a big supporter of Republicans for decades, though they also gave some quiet money to Hillary just in case she did win. 

By the way, Obadiah and Tony talked about it, and they agree. Sarah Palin is pretty hot for an older politician lady. 

Fact 3. On that note, Pepper would never have gotten her job if she had been fat or short or busted in the face by Tony's standards, wherein fat meant anything over a size four max before vanity sizing, short meant anything under five eight including average heel height over a seven day working period, and busted in the face meant anything that wouldn't have gotten a second look at at least one of the big three New York modeling agencies if the wearer had been about, say, fifteen. Maybe this theoretical assistant would have kept her job if she'd gotten that way after having worked for a while and shown how good she was. Also, she probably wouldn't have kept her job if she had been gorgeous, but incompetent. Still, though. 

Pepper has brains and guts and courage, but Tony Stark also looked her up on the internal Stark company intranet. He definitely pulled some grainy, black-and-white surveillance camera footage of Pepper walking to the vending machine at 11:28 PM and trying to get her share of the quarterly report done and accidentally flashing a little leg under the Anne Taylor Loft knee-length skirt and she was tired and miserable and so, so far from being done and nobody was around anyways. And if she had been married or had gotten pregnant in those first few months, before she had really become a part of Tony's life? Please. 

Don't delude yourself that Pepper getting the offer was about competence and guts and principles alone. 

Fact 4. A guy who thinks that his major winning point as a superhero is having privatized world peace thinks that Blackwater -- excuse me, Xe -- would have been a fucking great idea if only they hadn't been such fuckups. Also, for sale. Iron Man is like Blackwater. Only not a fuckup. And not for sale.


End file.
